Sunday, April 29, 2007

Rage as grave is moved

The world reacts, when Estonia decides to move a military grave and its monument from a busy bus station to a military grave yard according to the Geneva convention. Here are some of the reactions.

Russia: This is inhumane and blasphemous! How can people pay respect to the dead, if they are not buried under the bus station, so that we can feel them under our feet? They gave us only a year to think up a reaction, too, which is a direct insult. We can't pull out of Chechnya to mobilize our new invation of Estonia that fast. Not that I'm indicating any military operation, because I'm not indicating anything.

Germany urges Estonia to talk to Russia. It is important to please Russia, we (Germany) need that gas pipe through the Baltic Sea. "Don't ruin the deal for us, you ungrateful lot, you."

Norway urges Estonia and Russia to stop fighting. "Norway is the only country that borders Russia and never has had a conflict," the Norwegian Foreign Minister exclaimed. "Better do as Russia says, they are our friend. We're even working on an oil deal with them."

The UN responded by blowing soap bubbles, as always. "Loooook! Preeeettyyyy buuubbles! Looove, peeace and conciliaaation!"

USA thinks they all talk funny in Europe. In a surprise press release, however, the US Army buys out Dubbya International Airport in Baghdad to use as a mass grave for US soldiers. "Thanks for the tip," a spokesman for the DoD announced to Putin. "We'll use your idea, but make it bigger, since we'll need the acres and acres this airport gives us. And then we'll reopen the airport. It's brilliant! Integrating dead with airport will be a top tourist attraction when we have freed Iraq from Iraqis."

Russian super markets ban all Estonian commodities. "But we're not boycotting them, we just don't sell their stuff. If you want Estonian stuff, go get it yourself in Tallinn. They have open windows all over the place these days."

3 comments:

Valters said...

haha, funny story, thanks for sharing ;)! full support to estonians in their fight against illiterate russian looter hordes!

Kaur said...

Actually, EVEN Noway has had conflicts with Russia, most recent ones were connected with fishing.

Painting waves in clouds said...

From a recent radio program: Norway had no problem with fishing when dealing with the USSR, because the USSR was not worried about the value of fish, as long as it kept people in work. So Norway and the USSR traded fishing quotas: Norway got valuable fish and USSR got lots of chap fish. After the USSR dissolved, the story has been quite different. And "where exactly does the border at sea go" has been an issue for as long as I can remember.